shovelling the snow.

hey...its been awhile okay.
hmm..i watched an R(A) show for the first time....amazing huh.
i didnt even know till after the show cos i was late for the movie. thanks jh and lau. the show was barely a movie. but a great picture.
if u know what i mean....it was OLD BOY.

my stint as course commander is over cos my boss will be back on monday. guess what?! FINALLY!. haha. gave 15 corporals and 2 officers confinement and another two corporals got extra duty. feels shiok. some guys called me at 7 in the morning to ask for help. im like fuckoff. go to the right person. not everything is settled by me already. next year's gonna be torrid cos of the 2 month reduction. everythings changing so i'm gonna be full of stuff from now on. i cant wait for my ORD mood to kick in. jason's such a fucking bastard i swear i could just tell him that in his face. thanks don for being a dear, its good to know im not alone in the office.

my character is such. i cant change these little things. why'm i so soft when it comes to the crunch?. is it because i cant be bothered. what the hell, i get pushed around by my men. amazing but true. probably cos i used to be such an ass in the past i cant bring myself to go back. but im so much of a hey everybody lets just have a good time guy rather than a hey lets get the job done guy. is that an inherant flaw?.

i look back on this year earnestly. i've gone through alot, experienced alot and realised that most of them came partly because of the suffering. i did JCC early this year man. it seems like such a long time already.
okay thats my premature reflection of 2004. wheres 2005 dammit. travelling, flying, driving and maybe school. here i come.

new realization. im so good at coming up with theories and the root of the problem, i find that i still cant solve the problem. HOW USELESS IS THAT?!!?!. its like knowing your fucked up and not being able to do anything about it!!!!